Dear Bag of Chocolate

Dear Bag of Chocolate,

Thank you for being so delicious. We ate the entire thing. 

Love,

Becca and Kathy

P.S. It was so worth it.

A Night of Dancing and Then Thinking

So...I have really thought about some of the comments left on my last post and here is what I am come up with.

1. I am going to keep working really hard at dancing and one day it will just click. Until then I am going be patient. Patience isn't one of my strong suits but apparently I need to work on it so here it goes.

2. I am going to not worry about the boy situation. It's 100% up to him. Problem solved.

3. I am having a date night with God this weekend. Maddie and I are going to find a place that makes me feel close to him and we are having a big heart to heart meaning I am going to be still, know that he is God and listen. I haven't done much of that lately.

4. As far as some other stuff goes I am going to just do it.

Wow. I feel so much better. Nothing like a little perspective to ease the mind. I better hit the hay. It has been a long day following by a good 2 hours of solid social dancing tonight. Yes! 

Ladder Anyone?

I have so many post ideas rolling around in this head of mine but they are all in the conceptual stage. Boo. I have one that I have been thinking about for almost a week but I am still not completely sure how I want to approach it. It's going to be good though. For now all I have to really say is that I am kinda struggling. No real rhyme or reason to it except that there are so many unknowns going on in my life that I have kind of come to a stand still. Dancing is going awesome but I feel completely inadequate. There is a boy situation that I am unsure of what it is. I am trying to get my house decorated but it is slow and steady. I am just kind of in the "Doubting Thomas" stage which is never ever ever in the whole wide world a good idea so there it is. I am doubting myself and what I am capable of accomplishing. I need someone to get me a ladder so I can get over it. Anyone? No? Ugh. Maybe I'll find one myself...

I CAN'T SLEEP

And it's pissing me off. On top of that I am so itchy I can't freaking see straight. I am the kind of itchy that makes me want to scratch like a 5 year old scratches a mosquito bite. It is most definitely confirmed. I am allergic to the detergent that I recently washed almost 60% of everything I own in including but not limited to my bedding, towels and gym clothes. Unawesome if I must say so myself. I think it is time to just get up and start the day. Ugh. This is what I would call getting up on the wrong side of the bed. I am bound and determined to change my already crappy mood. I will have an excellent day. I WILL. Starting right now with bathing my dog, going grocery shopping and doing a once over on my house so I can spend the rest of the afternoon napping, washing everything I own again and decorating my house more. I picked up some fantastic decorations for next to nothing last night! Plus I am refinishing some more frames. So excited for the day ahead now...

So...When You Exercise A Lot

You kinda (read: do) need to eat a lot. I was totally dragging ass the last couple weeks and upon reviewing my diet with my dance partner I realized that I was eating like I lived a stationary life. Well...I'm not sure if you knew this about me or not but I don't live a stationary life so I way upped what I was eating and have felt much better that last couple of days. I still need to add a lot more protein since I realized that I am consuming mostly carbs but it was definitely a step in the right direction. Learn and grow...learn and grow.

That's all I got. I had all of these profound things I was planning on writing and I am totally drawing a blank. I guess it is after bedtime so I better get to sleep. Maybe all of my profound thoughts will come back to me after a good solid 8 hours.

'Night!

Oh! Oops!

I realized that I never actually wrote what my ultimate motivator was yesterday so...my ultimate motivator is seeing people change and become what they want to become. I love it. I love every freaking thing about it. I love reading what they write in their blogs. I love seeing pictures of them doing things they want to do. I love when people go for what they want rather then staying stagnant and complaining about "the cards they have been dealt". The reality is I have had some really crappy stuff happen to me. Most of which I have written about in one form or another. It would have been really easy to roll over and play dead just so I didn't have to deal with it. It would have been easy to use it as an excuse to not do the things that I wanted to do because of what had happened to me before but I didn't do that. I am slowly facing every single thing that has happened to be. I had a miscarriage that my husband at the time barely acknowledged. I went through a sucky divorce. I was sexually assaulted by my best friends husband. I blah...blah...blah... I am not defined by the things that happened to me. They are not an excuse to pretend that everything is okay and to not go after the things that I want so it makes me extremely excited to see other people go after it. To see other people acknowledge the crappiness that has happened to them and to say, "Yup. It happened. On with my life I will go." So that, my friends, is what REALLY motivates me. Seeing other people face and overcome their life struggles makes my day. So get after it everyone!

My Motivator

I now know what my ultimate motivator is and now that I know it totally makes sense but before now...well duh. As my post this morning put it I was so not in the mood for anything today. I slept really late, missed Bikram, missed the gym and missed my Dad supervising me changing my own oil. I missed my freeway exit when driving to work so then I was late to work. I arrived with no makeup on. I was totally and completely out of it today. I kind of rallied after watching a youtube video which I posted below. I am not sure if it is actually as funny as I found it but whatever. I literally laughed until I cried and it kept popping into my head throughout the rest of the day. It is one of those kinds of videos where a specific person immediately comes to mind that you must share it with as soon as possible.



Ahahahahahha! See?! Freaking hysterical! Anywho...I digress...my point? Um...oh yeah...my motivator...as I was sitting at Express MiE posting it on the persons Facebook page waiting for my pole intro class to completely arrive a gal walked up to the front desk. I glanced up and didn't pay a whole lot of attention until she said my name. She was looking at me like she knew me but I was pulling a complete blank until she said her name and I about fell over. She was in one of my level 1 pole classes a couple months ago. Not that I didn't think she looked good before but now? She looked freaking amazing! She has been busting her ass and it shows. She had new cute hair, had lost a ton of weight and it was like she was floating on cloud nine! She looked so happy! It then made me think...is this what people feel inside when they see changes in me? I literally was overjoyed to see her. It made my heart full just knowing that she is feeling better about herself. I. Love. My. Job. because I get to see people grow and change on a daily basis. Go Express MiE!

Meh.

I am feeling a little blah today. Nothing in particular. Just blah. I think I am doing too much on too little.

Get It!

I follow quite a few blogs and lately there has been a lot of buzz about setting goals or wanting to set goals but not knowing how or when or what. I have recently gotten back on the goal setting wagon with the help of the ballroom studio owner as well as pulling from my past experience of making and achieving many different goals. I am going to share what I am doing and you all can feel free to take the parts and pieces that you think would help you and if it is nothing...that's fine.

The owner is a huge fan of the book The Best Year of Your Life by Debbie Ford. I have purchased it and am in the midst of reading it. A lot of what I am doing in recommended by the book. Anywho, we were talking about setting goals in our staff meeting last week and my boss made a comment that literally altered my thinking forever. She said that when you set a goal for 2 years from now you will either be 2 years older with the goal achieved or not. Either way you are still 2 years older. I literally sat there thinking holy crap! She's right. I would hate to be in the exact same place I am right now 2 years from now. I can't imagine anyone wanting to stay stagnant for 2 years but how many of us do just that? For example, those of you that have been wanting to lose weight. I wanted to lose weight for almost 3 years before I finally did it. I was then 3 years older and still fat. Ugh. That sounds awful but I did it. I don't want to anymore so I WILL BE achieving the goals I posted up a week or so ago. 

So...onto what I am doing. First, I set the goals. You saw my entire list. That is literally all of my goals right now. I didn't edit it for the blog. I wrote it all out. That way you all know that I have something that I want to accomplish. That means I now have accountability to you all. Then I am breaking them down one by one with the following questions. Feel free to copy and paste them into your own word document. For me though, handwriting them out seems to make them more real and I have a designated journal for that. 

Planning Your Best Year Ever! 

1. Where do I want to go? What is my vision or final destination?

2. What is the specific goal that will move me toward my vision? And by what date do I want it to be accomplished?

3. What is the exact scope of the project or vision?

4. What are the milestones upon the way?

5. What skills do I already have that will support me in achieving my goal?

6. What skills do I need to develop to get the job done?

7. What assistance or support do I need?

8. How much of my time will be required on a daily or weekly basis?

9. How will I schedule this time in my calendar?

10. What are my "off roading" temptations that I need to watch out for?

11. Whom will I ask to hold me accountable for keeping my word?

12. What are the consequences for not following my plan?

13. What are my rewards for following my plan and reaching my destination?

I bet just reading those questions has gotten your mind in a tizzy (in a good way). I bet you all have so many thoughts flowing around and you have no idea where you should start. You want to change everything. Health. Spiritual Life. Relationships. Work. Family. Children. Pets. You House. Your Car. Savings. Spending. Etc... Before you get so excited you can hardly think grab a notebook and start writing. Write anything and everything you want to accomplish. Don't worry about categorizing them. Don't worry if it is too big. Don't worry if it is too small. Don't worry if it sounds dumb. Just write. 

Done? Okay....now put them all into different categories. It was best for me to split them into Business Goals (the dance studio), Personal Goals, Dance Goals, and Personal Business Goals. You may already be noticing that some them relate, right? I did. I want to get to goal body size and I want to become more flexible. Enter....Bikram Yoga. I am able to kill 2 birds with one stone. Go me! I then broke the goals in to different time periods: 3 month, 1 year, 5 year and DO NOW. That gives you a realistic time period. Anywho, there were some goals that I set to the side for accomplishing later because I am just not personally ready for achieving them and that's okay. If I set too many goals then my chances of failing increase 10 fold. I had to be really honest with myself. If your desire for changing isn't larger then your desire of staying the same then you will never ever ever accomplish the goal. Make sure you WANT IT. BAD. SO BAD YOU CAN TASTE IT. SO BAD THAT IS MAKES YOUR HEART FULL AT THE THOUGHT OF ACCOMPLISHING IT. You there? You want it? You want it bad? Good. Now change your life to make yourself able to accomplish it. 

Good luck everyone! 

No Rest for the Wicked

And the learning experiences keep rolling in...

I am a routine junkie. I like to have my days planned out from beginning to end and when they don't work out as planned I get anxious. I mean REALLY anxious. Late last night my dance training was changed to another studio. It kicked my ass today. I worked out at a different gym, didn't have my dance shoes, didn't have my notebook, didn't have my folder, etc...I was a hot mess to say the least. I had a hard time concentrating and found myself getting easily frustrated. So...I need to let go a little bit and become more flexible but at the same time I think it's okay to have a routine set up. It helps me know what I need to have ready for the day. Know what I mean? For example, yesterday I went to Bikram Yoga, the gym, Fred Astaire and then Express MiE that means I had to have my Bikram stuff, gym stuff, shower stuff, ballroom stuff, pole dancing stuff and my lunch. If I didn't have some sort of a routine set up there is no way I would have been properly prepared, right? But on the other hand I can't be completely out of sorts like I was today. It's this whole happy medium thing I need to work on. I kinda live in the whole go big or go home mentality but I need to be more like go big or do the best you can.

I ALSO got called out when dancing tonight. I have been wanting to spend a bit more time working on my dancing and I found a willing partner so I will now be leaving my studio after work and heading straight over to the Chandler location for at least another hour of straight dancing. YES! Let's just say that I literally danced from 2:00-9:30 tonight with about 30 minutes for a dinner break. Was it worth it? Oh...heck yes. I am tired? Oh...heck yes. Am I going to do it tomorrow? Oh...heck yes. How was I called out? One of the other instructors, Brett, is who I will be dancing with at night and I told him all of my issues are fair game for the telling. If I don't know I'm doing it wrong then I can never fix it, right? Well...what happens when you tell an extremely honest person to tell the truth? They tell the truth. He said, "I can't feel you. When I dance with you I don't know what to do because you aren't there. It's like you are dancing by yourself." Burn. Burn. Burn. He's right. I have even pulled away from Lead lately.

I realized tonight that I had done it because of something that happened in one my personal friendships. I stopped feeling safe so I retracted all trust from EVERYONE and EVERYTHING. Brett brought me out of it in a BIG way. He worked with me for almost an hour and a half solid on just the Foxtrot basic which is (for me) back, back, side together. Over and over and over and over and over until I had it. One of the other instructors also really worked with me on my frame so I held my own and looked like what I need to look like. Correcting my frame also helped me to follow better. That's another thing I love about dancing. It is only when all of the parts and pieces are working together in harmony does the dance look and feel like it should. You can't cheat. You can't take short cuts. You can't not hold up your end of the bargain. Kinda like marriage. If both people aren't in and working then the marriage isn't what it should be. This whole dance thing is going to change my life in so many different ways.

I also totally forgot to tell you all about my 30 days of Bikram Yoga challenge. It is exactly what it sounds like. I have to do Bikram Yoga 30 times in 30 days. I am wanting to improve my flexibility while also getting back on the whole accomplishing goals bandwagon. This is an easy way to work myself back in to accomplishing a goal without having to put too much thought or effort into it. That's not completely true actually...time has to go into it and a little bit of effort but you know what I'm saying.

What You Say Is What You Get

Confessions by Kathy: I am the most critical person in the world when it comes to me, myself and I. I didn't know it until I was called out on Friday...in a BIG way. Apparently when I am with the other instructors working on learning different patterns or improving my technique I am constantly checking and looking, adjusting and changing, moving and shifting everything about myself in the HUGE floor length, room length mirror. My hair. My shirt. My makeup. My skirt. My shoes. My everything. Nothing ever seems to be just right. Nothing. As I was once again fixing my shirt one of the other instructors said something that literally stopped me mid-motion. He said, "Stop it Kathy. You look stunning. You always look stunning. You're too critical of yourself."

Ouch.

I knew I was critical but I didn't realize how deep it went. Since then I started paying attention to how I actually talk to myself. Here's what I discovered. I'm awful. For example, Friday night I went to a friend's birthday party dinner and another friend came with me. Someone took a picture of us together and, of course, that picture was then posted on Facebook. When I saw the picture you know what I thought first? "Damn...he's hot". Oh and then I thought, "Ugh. I look like shit". Probably not the exact order you were expecting but whatever...it is what it is. My point? That is *almost* always the first thing I think about when I see myself. I often make jokes like, "It's so hard being me. Always waking up looking so good" and the likes but the reality is...I don't see myself that way. In fact, I was talking to a friend tonight and I confessed that I am even more critical of what I look like now then what I looked like 45 pounds ago. Crazy, huh?

Needless to say this new experiment I started is going to be very important to me. OH! I totally forgot to tell you all about it. Never fear! Here it is:

Based off of a story told during the sermon at church yesterday my friend Melissa and I decided we must give it a go. We took 3 identical, never before used jars and labeled them...well 2 out of the 3. First one is Love, second is Hate and the third is going to be completely Ignored. This experiment is based off of Dr. Masaru Emoto's theory that how you talk to water will effect what the outcome of the contents over a period of time will look like. Everyday the Love Jar will get words of encouragement and gratitude while the Hate Jar will get words of disdain. Again, the Ignored Jar will be completely and utterly ignored. According to the original experiment the contents of the Love Jar should ferment giving off a nice, sweet smell while the contents of the Hate Jar will turn black and the Ignored Jar will rot.

Sounds ridiculous, right? Watch this. 

Here's more food for thought. If this is what that kind of attention does to water and rice imagine what it does to humans. We are like 70% water, aren't we? Obviously God didn't intend for us to treat each other how we sometimes do but so much so that our bodies physically react to it. I know who I became after a couple years of verbal abuse. I was an empty shell of a person. Unfortunately I picked up right where my ex-husband and every other guy I dated left off. I still struggle with not feeling like I deserve better. I can't even handle being nice to myself so why should anyone else, right? I guess it is a good thing that I have decided to surround myself with ONLY positive people not for any other reason but to become more like them. I want to be the type of person that people want to be around. Know what I mean? Anywho...

Here is the beginning  of The Great Experiment of 2010...

And for fun here is proof that I am completely incapable of making rice. I even read and thought I followed the directions to a "T". No such luck. 

Blessed?

I'm feeling overwhelmingly blessed today. No particular reason but just really feeling God. I know He is always there and I am the one that moves but today? I'm close. I need to stay that way. Here is the misconception about feeling blessed. Often people seem to equate feeling blessed with only having good things happening in their lives. That isn't how it is for me. The thing is I have a ton of stuff I could be stressed or feel "unblessed" about but what good would it do me to think and stress and think and agonize and all of those other ugly words I could use to describe it?

My blessings (at least the ones I could think of since we all know there are TONS more we may not even know about) in no particular order except the first one:

1. A God who loves me enough to help me with even the smallest of things like getting to Utah at the last minute and the biggest of things to put people in my life that will forever change who I am.

2. The best family on the planet.

3. The best dog a gal could ever hope for.

4. A fantastic church that I fit to a "T" that I wouldn't have found on my own. (Thanks again God!)

5. A wonderful place to live that I have finally been given inspiration to decorate.
5a. My kitchen is going to have a rooster theme. My late Grandmother made a rooster pitcher that sits on my fridge and it has grown and grown and grown on me so much that I want to design the room around it. (Sorry Mom!) Colors: Deep red and white
5b. My dining room is going to be the house of the giant fork and spoon. I am going to frame other normal but cool looking forks and spoons in shadow boxes all around it so it has a fun "this is where we eat just in case you didn't know" feel. Colors: Deep red, tan and brown
5c. The living room is where my 48 star antique flag is going to go. I am excited to see how this room is going to shape. There are a couple pieces of furniture I need to get rid of before I can do a lot with it so it's still in the works. Colors: Deep red, blue and off white.
5d. My bedroom is where I am VERY excited to decorate. This one is super in the works and a lot is still being sorted out but I *hopefully* will unveil it COMPLETE within a couple weeks. Colors: Black and off white Damask and sage.

6. A small, solid group of a couple of people, both friends and family, who love and accept me for me. I kept trying to make the particular circle bigger but it kept ending in heart ache so I am back to the small and wonderful. I'll be staying that way as well.

7. Music. I love music. I love listening to music. I love singing music (though I'm not good at it). I love dancing to music. I love sharing music. I love music. It can change my mood for either the good or the bad so I am very selective about what I listen to.

8. Tres Dias. It changed my life. For real. Today was the first meeting for the weekend coming up in October and I am beyond excited for where I am going to serve.

9. Dancing. It is such a different experience to wake up happy to face the day. I get to look forward to dancing and dancing and dancing and teaching and dancing and being around a bunch of really positive people who also love their jobs. That, my friends, is the life.

10. Phoenix. I used to hate and wanted to hate Phoenix until this year. I decided to love where I am at and oh man! It made such a difference. It's still blazing hot but it's MY blazing hot.

11. This blog. It literally transformed my life writing about my experiences at Express MiE and beyond. What started at a day to day "this is how I'm losing weight" blog turned into a "this is my life, my dirt, my fun, my happiness, my pain, my love, my everything" blog and I wouldn't change it for the world.

I know there is way more but this is what I am feeling drawn to write about right now. Maybe it would be fun if each one of you reading this posted a comment of one or more things that you are grateful for? Yes? No? Maybe? It would be fun to read other peoples blessing. No pressure though.

By the way...this is what I have been listening to over and over and over and over as I have written this.

GOALS!

I have been somewhat goalless for the last couple of months and my life has definitely shown it. So...as I already shared the owner of the ballroom studio I work for is BIG on goals. It has been awesome because it jump started my goal planning. I really thought about my goals before I committed them to paper and now posting them on the WWW will help keep me accountable. They are in 4 different categories and some sub categories within those categories. I'll try to keep them as clear as possible. Also, there are 3 month, 1 year, 3 (only a couple), and 5 years goals within each category along with a DO NOW section for each particular goal. Clear as mud?

Business Goals - Ballroom Studio

3 Month 

• Teaching 15-18 lessons per week
• Practice dancing when not teaching

1 Year 

• Teach 32+ lessons per week
• Regularly meet bonus requirments
• Test out of full Bronze

3 Year

• Maintain 1 year goals
• Test out of Silver

5 Year

• Maintain 1 year and 3 year goals
• Test out of Gold

DO NOW

• Review all paperwork daily until it becomes second nature
• Learn dance terminology

Dance Goals

3 Month

• Find and purchase gown material and pattern
• Dance anytime I don't have students
• Start going out dancing socially

1 Year 

• Compete in all competitions with Lead
• Win Novice/Novice twice with Lead
• Maintain my love of dance

5 Year 

• Maintain 1 year goals

DO NOW

• Dance 
• Dance 
• Dance

Personal Business Goals

3 Month

• Find Business Name
• Complete Business Package

1 Year

• Make $2,000 per month designing with all profit going to pay off student loans

5 Year

• Pay off all $90,000 of student loans

DO NOW

• Set up desk

Personal Goals

3 Month

• Write and follow daily to do list
• Increase flexibility using Bikram yoga
• Get to goal weight
• Follow routine
• Follow menu
• Surround myself with only positive people

1 Year

• Maintain goal weight
• Backpack the Grand Canyon rim to rim to rim
• Run 1/2 marathon

5 Year 

• Maintain goal weight
• Visit 1 national park a year
• Be married again

DO NOW

• Find Bikram studio and sign up
• Write out routines to follow
• Write out menus to follow
• Make myself open to dating

There they are folks. My goals. Out in the open. Now anyone, anytime, anywhere can look at them. I feel so exposed but I like it...Rar!

Upside Down and The 29 #10

My cousin threw a mini family reunion in Utah this past weekend and I almost couldn't go. Flights were $400 and I just couldn't justify that so last week I said a little prayer to God that went something like this, "God, I really want to go to Utah but I can't afford the flight and my car won't make it. It would be super rad if I could go though..." That's really how I talk to him. Anywho, the very night that I prayed about it one of the guys who teaches ballroom at the place I work posted about going to Utah for the weekend of the 4th. Not having the intention to ride with him I asked him about his trip the next day. Guess who offered to let me ride with him?! That's right, my friends! I quickly called my cousin to give her the good news while almost bursting into tears of excitement. God is so good. He even cares about the littlest of things. Anywho...onto the trip.

Three of us from the Fred Astaire studio ended up carpooling to Utah together. Here's the fascinating thing...we were all going to different places but our freeway exits were within a 5 mile stretch. Isn't that cool?! We left immediately after work on Thursday and drove straight through arriving in Utah at 10:35am which was just in time for me to change my clothes, get in the car and head to the Lagoon, a cute little amusement park about a 40 min drive from my cousins. Mind you...at this point I hadn't slept yet. In fact, I had gotten no sleep since 8:30 the morning before. A terrible idea to say the least.

The park was FANTASTIC! Here's a little something you may or may not know about me...I'm kinda of a pansy. I don't ride roller coasters. Ever. Not since I was at Disneyland when I was like 10. I'm now 29 and my cousin got me to ride almost every single ride. She didn't even have to peer pressure me.

Her: "Hey...wanna go ride (fill in the blank)?"
Me: "Sure."

She helped me write a line to sum up the entire experience, "More often then not it turned out to be a terrible idea and yet...it was still amazing and we laughed until we cried." MUM and her family were also there and the best part of the whole day aside from spending uninterrupted time with family was watching my niece and nephew on their first trip to an amusement park. Their excitement lit up the entire park. I did pretty good with the lack of sleep until after we ate lunch. I crashed. Hard. So I went to lay down in the grass for a little bit. Here's another little secret you probably don't know about me. When I am with people and we somehow get separated I will wander around yelling "Marco" until I hear a "Pole". It is so much easier then yelling Mom or the persons name. Anywho, I was all nestled into the grass with my hat pulled over my eyes just on the cusp of sleep when I heard really loud in my ear, "MARCO!" I think my heart stopped a little bit. Actually...I know it did. I ended up getting about 15 minutes of sleep after that and another 15 minute nap later on so I wasn't a complete train wreck.

Upside Down and The 29 #10

Not only did I ride a bunch of regular roller coasters I rode one that went upside down. That's right. Upside down. Also, there was one point on the roller coaster that we were so close to the ground (sideways) that I could have reached out and touched the cement. It would have ripped my hand off but that's besides the point. The ground was that close. I eventually just closed my eyes. Closed eyes or not...I did it.

The rest of the weekend just floated by. Tons of laughter and family time. Much, much needed. It was kinda good to see my cousins together. They have one of the best marriage relationships I have ever seen. They have been married for 10+ (I can't remember the exact number) years and are still each other's best friend. The love and respect that they have for each other is so awesome to see. I want that. I really do. I want a husband that can make me laugh like no one else on Earth can. I want a husband that goes out of him way to make sure that I am comfortable at all times. I want a husband that I can do the same thing for. To add the cliche line to my description of them...they literally complete each other. I want that.

The weekend came to a close on Sunday when the guys came to pick me up. We decided to take another route home that took us past Bryce Canyon. I'm not counting it as a part of my 29 yet because we only did a quick drive through but it was breathtaking. Oh! How oh how did I forget to add this?! We were driving through some tiny town in Southern Utah when we spotted a little yard sale. I asked them to stop thinking it was going to be a corny little buy my used pickle jar kind of yard sale and I was pleasantly surprised. It was a full blown antique shop both inside and out. We wandered around and then we came across...the 3ft wooden fork and spoon combo for $22. Why am I sharing that? Because I am now the proud owner of a 3ft wooden fork and spoon combo for $22.

Since Sunday, when we were driving back, was 4th of July we were blessed with watching 4 different firework shows as we drove along. Also, due to the fireworks, we had to make a quick stop in Page, AZ because they had the highway shut down trying to direct firework traffic. We decided to have dinner and stopped at the most amazing country dive bar (remember how much I love them?). We ended up staying and dancing for quite a while. Everyone else there really only knew how to line dance. Us on the other hand did a bit of Salsa, Rumba, Hustle, AZ 2 Step and Cha Cha. Man...I love to dance. We finally got home well after 3 in the morning.

This trip will literally go down in the history books for me as one of the best trips EVER.

What The?!, Yachts, Bad Singing and The 29 #'s 7, 8, and 9

I had no desire to go. None. Something had happened the morning of the day I was supposed to leave and it totally zapped my adventuring spirit which is totally not my personality at all but thank goodness I was scheduled to be one of the drivers so off I went. Oh. My. Gosh. Best decision ever.

The day started with me arriving late not realizing that everyone was caravanning. Nothing like feeling like a total a-hole right from the start. Anywho, the gals riding with me loaded up and we got on the road. Shortly after starting they realized that they forgot their luggage. Oops. After we fixed that little situation we got on the road again and let's just say...let the laughing begin. I literally laughed until I cried on several occasions and laughed so hard that when I woke up the next day my abs hurt. Oh! I totally forgot to tell you where we were going...Bisbee, Arizona. Why you ask? Only one of the most magical places on Earth...The Shady Dell. But first...

THE THING - The 29 #7

You've all seen the billboards on the way to Tucson (at least if you are from AZ). Visit The Thing of the Desert or something like that. I personally have been curious but never curious enough to actually go until I was a part of the caravan. Let's just say...um...uh...I can't believe we drove 40 miles out of our way to see it but at the same time my life does feel a little more complete. Weird? I know. Anywho, I am not going to post pictures of the actual "Thing: since my Dad yelled at me for putting the pics on Facebook since you aren't supposed to (to maintain the mystery) but here are some pics of not The Thing.

The Shady Dell - The 29 #8

EVERYONE needs to add this place to their bucket list for several reasons.

1. It's freaking rad.
2. It's freaking rad.
3. The owner is hot.
4. It's freaking rad.

For real though...I booked Rita D. Yacht which in the pics was a yacht but some reason I don't think that it actually registered to me that I was going to be staying in a yacht until I rounded the corner and there it was...Rita. The gals riding with me and I all burst into excited laughter at the sight of her. It is, in fact, a full blown yacht.

Right?! I had the same reaction. It is a freaking yacht! The rest of the place is a cute little "trailer park". One of the gals who works at Express MiE organized the whole weekend so most of the people were people from the studio and the remainder of the people were their friends. Here are some more pictures for your viewing pleasure.

So amazing, right? We all got there, settled in and then the cooking began. Christie's, the owner of Express Mie, significant other made THE BEST guacamole I have eaten in a long time. I *may* have just parked myself next to the dish and became well acquainted with it. My *may* I actually mean *did*. See?

Anywho, we ate and then headed into the great city of Bisbee for a night on the town. Yup. You heard right. A night on the town. Here's the thing about Kathy...I LOVE dive bars. The divier (is that a word?) the better. Oh and I should add that there were like 16 of us. We all got settled in to listen to and dance to the local band. Let's just say we owned that dance floor. And that brings me to...

Karaoke - The 29 #9

After we mastered the first dive bar we moved onto the next one...a karaoke bar. I have never done karaoke in my entire life. In fact, I have only gone to a karaoke place like once. The girls got me to sing karaoke and I didn't hate it. Would I sing a song by myself? Not in a million years. Would I sing Bohemian Rhapsody by Queen with a bunch of girls that I love? In a heart beat. I also was a backup dancer for some other people in our group who were singing. It was fun to get out of my comfort zone a bit. I have been slacking in that department. Never fear...I am back and in action.

The weekend ended with us shopping in Bisbee and then heading home. Unfortunately it is like a 4 hour drive to Bisbee but I would totally do it again. Oh! I almost forgot to tell you that I found the most amazing thing at the antique shop...a 48 star flag. That's right, my friends, a 48 star flag? What am I going to do with it you ask? Oh...I have no idea. Maybe hang it in my living room? Who knows.

Mini Mid-Life Crisis

Can you have a mid-life crisis before you actually reach mid-life? I feel like you can and that I did. Here is what I learned these last couple of weeks.

1. Friendships, no matter what the other people say, are conditional.
2. My family does love me for EXACTLY who I am and accepts me with all of my quirks.

Here is what I am going to do about it.

1. Renew all of my relationships with my family. These last couple of months so much has taken precedent over them and I have to set a boundary. I need my family and they need me.
2. Focus on getting my life together with the help of God. I realized I was looking to outside forces to help me with that and when those outside forces abandoned me I stopped working. God doesn't abandon.
3. Write out my routines and menu so that all I have to do is look at the day and know what I should be doing. One of my GF's bought me a subscription to clean eating magazine and it is going to become my food "bible".
4. Meet some people that know how to dance so I can go out socially dancing.
5. Have one day a month that is dedicated to spending time with MUM and working on projects. While I was in Utah this past weekend we went shopping and I stepped back and actually thought about how many projects I have that are just waiting to get done. Um...there's a lot and I didn't buy more to add to it.

I am sure there are a lot more items to add to the list but that will have to do for now because I need to head to the studio. Come back and visit later tonight because I have lots and lots to post about that I have been putting off. I PROMISE I WILL CATCH UP TONIGHT. There are some goodies...

It was never between you and them anyway

People are often unreasonable, illogical, and self-centered; Forgive them anyway. 

If you are kind, People may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives; Be kind anyway. 

If you are successful, you will win some false friends and some true enemies; Succeed anyway. 

If you are honest and frank, People may cheat you; Be honest and frank anyway. 

What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight; Build anyway. 

If you find serenity and happiness, They may be jealous; Be happy anyway. 

The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow; Do good anyway. 

Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough; Give the world the best you've got anyway. 

You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and God; It was never between you and them anyway.

~ Mother Teresa